Act, Don’t React
Being a parent is a demanding and stressful job. Reflective parenting provides you with an understanding of your own motivations. As a result, you can respond more productively to family interactions. Inevitably however, there will be moments when you don’t act productively. And while there is nothing worse than the regret you feel after you have responded poorly to your child, take heart. It doesn’t have to end there. Research has shown that the most important issue in family meltdowns is not if you lose your temper/mind/reflective capacity. Sooner or later, you will. It’s how you fix it. Reflective parenting helps you repair your relationship with your child after such moments. As best, they can provide “family glue,” and affirm and deepen your connection with your child. Some of the most positive moments as a parent can come during the “mop up” of a meltdown.
Of course, this doesn’t just apply to parents. Multiple studies have shown that practicing reflective parenting teaches your child to become aware of her own feelings, and more conscious of what she intends to say. With this awareness, she can develop strategies for managing her own behavior and begin to think before she acts. At the end of the day, when you are able to think about your feelings and your child can consider her own, you are both able to act, not react.
In practical terms, reflective parenting will help you:
- learn new ways to communicate with your child
- feel more confident in your parenting
- improve your ability to help your child manage his emotions
- improve your ability to manage your own emotions
- use effective strategies for discipline and behavior
- trust your instincts and thoughts about your child and parenting
- understand the importance of your own behavior and feelings.